Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
Randomize
