he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
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