i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Randomize
