I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
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