I only kidnapped one of them. chill
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
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