I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
ALERT: Turns out when I'm drunk I turn into a clepto. I just found keys, a ketchup bottle, and sweatshirt in my backpack that don't belong to me. If yours, come collect from me. I'm still drunk in the back of biology lecture.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Randomize
