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• (847): View more from Illinois

  So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be

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• (317): View more from Indiana

  can you pick me up an extra syllabus

  (317): View more from Indiana

  i passed out in the shower again

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• (703): View more from Virginia

  Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.

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• (815): View more from Illinois

  Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia

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• (914): View more from New York

  It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional

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• (765): View more from Indiana

  I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.

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• (941): View more from Florida

  He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.

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• (404): View more from Georgia

  Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.

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• (402): View more from Nebraska

  REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.

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• (909): View more from California

  My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.

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• (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.

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• (210): View more from Texas

  I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK

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• (813): View more from Florida

  Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.

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• (731): View more from Tennessee

  Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up

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• (217): View more from Illinois

  I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?

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