Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Randomize
