I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Randomize
