absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
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