i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Randomize
