Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
Randomize
