He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
