Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
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