Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Randomize
