let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
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