so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
