do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Randomize