plz talk dirty to me
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Randomize
