I hope mine doesn't look like that
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Randomize
