Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Randomize
