The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
