If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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