He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
dude i'm inner monologue high
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
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