I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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