That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize
