I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
