it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I need water and some morals
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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