Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
I need to wash the frat house off of me
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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