im drinking this country out of the recession.
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
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