im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Randomize
