This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
