you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
