i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
