i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
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