North Korea, Best Korea!
Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Randomize
