So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
Randomize
