do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
