You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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