i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Randomize
