I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
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