yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
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