I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Randomize
