Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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