A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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