she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
Randomize
