so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
His hands were made for my vagina.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
