"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
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