In the future we'll all be gay
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
Randomize
