Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
